He....

He is trapped in a life of drudgery.

There are moments when he has glimpses of what he loves. Moments of brilliance when all the pieces fall together in perfect synergy. Moments of clarity, when his focus and passion are renewed by little victories, little hurdles stepped over, minor hills climbed and conquered and in those moments he smiles to himself because he got through the day, or the hour or the meeting in one piece and he did well.

But he feels trapped.

Because more often than not the days all flow by the same. He wakes up, takes a shower, packs his laptop bag and his banana and drives to work in the traffic that aggravates him but is a part of the city he lives in. He dusts off his suit and sits at his desk. Puts his headsets on and zones out to the numbers in front of him and the music that lives inside his head. The occasional text, the occasional phone call and a few clients later, he moves on to the next part of his day that is the same as that part of his day the day before. And its boring and demoralising except for those moments of brilliance.

He has alot going for him. 

Nobody really knows it yet, but then again, nobody really knows him. He is quiet. Funny but reserved. Always impeccably dressed and well spoken. Always sincere even when his mind is a billion miles away, calculation a trade or planning a vacation. And he doesn't get alot of those. His time has not been his own for a while now. Even when he sleeps he does not rest because his sleep is quotad. Soon he will have to wake up to be the WonderKid. Solving problems, being the scapegoat, but always being exceptional at being who he is, because he is brilliant but even he doesn't know how much so.

He has few friends. They do not really understand him. And he accepts that. Because the most interesting things in life are puzzles and he prefers his own company anyway. He has women in his life. They love him in degrees and like him in amounts. Some are his mothers, others are his friends, yet others are undefined dalliances. He is only in love with one.

But even she doesn't know it.

She lives on the periphery of his world. Essential to his existence but always at a distance because that is his way and because she understands that, they live in quiet, comfortable "side-by-sideness" even when they haven't seen each other for days on end. And she loves him. Dearly. She just doesn't know quite how to. Thing about it is he would do anything for her, but he doesn't know it either because she will never ask. But no matter what happens between them, living without each other has never been the option.  

And so he wakes up every day. Searching for something. Because he knows something is missing. But he never finds it before he goes to bed and he will wake up tomorrow still looking for it.

He is trapped in drudgery.

But he remains cheerful. Never saying an unkind word. Never rude or impolite. Selfish in his own ways but only to preserve himself and his sanity. And nobody can withold that from him. He loves many things but he no longer has the time for them because if he is to become somebody he has to put in the hours.

He has a lot to be proud of. And people are proud of him. A work in progress. He has grown in alot of ways. Some inexplicable. Others tangible. And his aesthetic has changed. He is no longer a boy. He has transformed and is on the verge of something. Wings unfurling, muscles churning, speed rushing through him, propelling him towards his destiny.

But he remains on the verge. Waiting. Trapped in drudgery. Waiting for release, for something to change, for something new.

He doesn't know why he is here. But he is. And for another day he will keep going, his passion fuelled by those glimpses of brilliance, his resolve strengthened by sheer force of faith.

Faith in Possibility.